Monday, April 24, 2006

Past Mistakes

Current mood: confused
These past couple of weeks have been a roller coaster of emotion, stress, and tiredness! I just recently got back in touch with an ex of mine, and realized what a huge mistake I made by treating him the way I did, and ending things like I did. I, never in a million years, should have let that one go. He's got a new girlfriend now, whose pregnant, but from what I hear, they aren't doing too well. He's been by my house a couple of times, and we've hung out and things are still the same as they were when we were together. It's like we never were apart. He was at the house last night, and we got to talking about what might've been and what should've been and realized that we both miss each other so incredibly much. He's been thinking about things lately, and realizes he's stuck in between a rock and a really, really hard spot. They don't get along, fight everyday, but she is the boss's he's afraid he'll lose the job he loves more than anything. We've talked about the choices and both agreed that things will be hard for awhile, but if we're both willing (and we are) things will eventually work out. It's just so hard to see him leave my house everynight, when we both know that he belongs with me. Our relationship was perfect when we were together. I was the happiest I've ever been with him, and we have so much fun together. My dumbass decided that I'd pull the whole "I just got out of a 3 year relationship" card (which wasn't a lie, I had) and lost the best thing that has ever happened to me. What in the hell am I supposed to do now?

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